My Grandpa’s SECRET To Marital Bliss
Saying SORRY Is Not Enough
There were 3 main things my grandfather was quoted for saying were the reason for his marital bliss. He was in his 70s. What do I mean by marital bliss?
The kind of couples you see so rarely nowadays. Old couples who still kiss each other hello and goodbye. They get along. They don’t do spiteful things to one another. I remember my grandad visited us one time and said he had to go back after 3 weeks. I knew he was retired so I wondered: “What ever for?”
It was because granny would miss him, or vice versa. They turned into two depressed ducklings if they were away from each other too much. That’s love, if you ask me.
1. Honesty
I understand this one is not exactly a breakthrough in modern science so I’ll keep it short. I was on the bus with my grandfather once and I had heard somewhere that old people know the secrets of life. So I asked him a question similar to, “Eh, what’s the meaning of life grandpa?” He said, and I’ll never forget this, “I don’t know.”
Just kidding. But he did say the only area in life he seemed to have done well in was his marriage. He said that when making decisions as a couple, they inevitably had to go with one person’s idea or the other’s. They never made these decisions behind each other’s backs. They also had a rule. Whoever’s decision they went with, once agreed upon the other party was not allowed to quip an “I told you so” if things went South.“But they probably would anyway,” I hear you think. Nope, because they knew their turn would come next.
2. They Didn’t Celebrate Materialism
I don’t think I had ever witnessed my grandparents exchange any gifts other than at Christmas during my whole life — and I was raised by them for most of my childhood. No anniversaries. No Valentine’s Day (it wasn’t celebrated in my country at the time anyway). Imagine current relationships — you’ve been with your girlfriend/ boyfriend seriously for a while and you got them something handmade for their birthday. How many of you would be worried about it? How many of you would be worried that they bought you something expensive and mass-produced and you would feel bad? There’s all this pressure.
My grandparents went on holidays together a lot. I don’t think I’ve ever fallen in love with anyone because they gave me a box of something anyway.
3. Asking For Forgiveness Rather Than Saying “Sorry”
Why does this work? “Sorry” doesn't do anyone any good. It really doesn’t. At least with saying, “Will you forgive me?” you know where the whole thing stands.
Plus, try to tell someone you forgive them and then be spiteful. Seriously. It’s impossible! As humans, and some more than others, we have an aversion to being hypocrites.
So if you can get someone to SAY they’ll forgive you, even if they haven’t yet, they will eventually. Plus, I think they’ll appreciate it more.
Note: I am not married and I am not a marriage guru. This advice was my grandfather’s but who knows? It may not apply to you. If you hate your significant other, take an opportunity to write to Santa and ask for a new one.
Hopefully this article helps you in some way.
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